Health Notes

Beating the Sex Life “Blahs”

by Brier Jirka, Sex Therapist on March 18, 2014

3-18-14 Initiating SexDo you feel like your sex life and your desire to maintain one is on the downslide? You aren’t alone.

This weekend I read an article by one of my favorite sex therapists, Dr. Marty Klein, author of “Sexual Intelligence: Sex- and Culture, Politics, the Media- and Sex,” who is currently training therapists in New Zealand. The main questions he is being asked are about sexual desire: Why does it decline in loving couples and how do we enhance it?

These are common questions I hear in my clinic as well. At least 85 percent of my cases have to do with desire. One of the most common concerns both Dr. Klein and I hear is on the subject of initiating sex.

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Too Old for Sex? Think Again.

by Brier Jirka, Sex Therapist on March 4, 2014

The societal norm tells us that sexual desire goes down with age. No one wants to think about their aging parents having sex, let alone their grandparents.  But have you thought about what your own sex life will be like as you age?

I recently read an article titled, “Midlife Women Who Value Sex Keep On Having it.” It was based on research of midlife women’s sex lives done by the University of Pittsburgh published earlier this month in the medical journal, JAMA Internal Medicine.

I find this research intriguing due to work with many peri- and post-menopausal women in my Pelvic Pain and Sexual Wellness clinic at the Methodist Physician’s Clinic Women’s Center. We even have a service focused on menopause. This is a huge topic in the media and sex research because of an aging population that is living longer and wanting sex later in life.

New research shows middle age women who state sex was “moderately to extremely important” were three times as likely to remain sexually active as women who said “not at all.” It really sends home the message I teach to couples that sex is what you make it. If you want to continue having sex, you will find a way. It just might be different than you expect.

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Five Things Driving Your Partner Crazy

Thumbnail image for Five Things Driving Your Partner Crazy February 18, 2014

After being with my partner Brad for six years, we get a lot of questions from friends about when we are going to tie the knot. And, as you can imagine, this always leads us to discussions about being married. Recently, I ran across an article titled, “10 Things that Drive Men Completely Insane about […]

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The Birds, the Bees and Sex among the Species

Thumbnail image for The Birds, the Bees and Sex among the Species February 4, 2014

It’s that time of year again, a time that many people either love or hate. The holiday that brings in the cash for Hallmark, floral shops and restaurants: Valentine’s Day. As I have said before, Valentine’s Day isn’t a special day for me. I actually prefer to stay in, watch “Die Hard” and eat Chinese […]

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Stop Hating Your Body; 5 Ways to Feel Sexy

Thumbnail image for Stop Hating Your Body; 5 Ways to Feel Sexy January 20, 2014

I recently read an article about a storefront in New York City that is stirring up a bit of controversy. It was sent to me through my sex therapy certification organization, the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists. The article shows how the trendy clothing brand American Apparel recently placed mannequins with pubic […]

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Five Resolutions for a Better Relationship

Thumbnail image for Five Resolutions for a Better Relationship January 7, 2014

Happy 2014 everyone! I have to say that it’s great to be back blogging. I’m looking forward to what 2014 has for me and my family. This time of year, everyone is talking about what they want to change in 2014. Many of those things have to do with eating better, exercise, or saving money. […]

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Everybody needs self-care…even me!

October 15, 2013

We are a society that is prone to moving through life at 100 miles per hour. Between jobs, kids and family, people today rarely take time to just stop and reflect about their priorities, or simply recharge their “life battery.” In my profession as a sex therapist, I often ask my patients to list their […]

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Yes, there is an app for that!

September 24, 2013

It is 2013 and we can’t walk through the mall or drive down the street without seeing someone on their cell phone. As a sex therapist  at Methodist Physicians Clinic Women’s Center I work with many people who complain about how much their significant other uses their cell phone or iPad. I spend so much […]

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Intimacy every night – yeah it’s possible

September 10, 2013

On my way to work recently, I heard a story on the radio about two long-term couples that chose to have sex every night for a year to see if it would strengthen their marriages. The “sexperiment,” as one couple called it, took place back in 2006. However, books about this experiment were just recently […]

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Lubrication education for couples

August 20, 2013

Working as a sex therapist at the Methodist Physicians Clinic Women’s Center Pelvic Pain and Sexual Medicine Clinic allows me to educate hundreds of women and men about lubrication. This is a very misunderstood area of sexuality. There are many things that can contribute to a lack of lubrication during sex such as low estrogen, […]

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